Today is one of those days. The days where the babies gang up on me and play tag team. One goes down for a nap…the other refuses. Nap baby wakes up just as refuse nap baby goes down. No breaks for mama to drink her coffee and no coffee equals very tired, grumpy mama.

Why is it that I feel so much guilt over leaving the babies for a few days with Jeff when I clearly need a break? The guilt has got me good. My two best girlfriends and I are planning a trip in August and while I am excited beyond belief I feel so bad about leaving Jeff with the two crazies for 3 days. Why do I think nobody can care for them except for me? It’s certainly not an ego thing…more like I don’t want Jeff to have to deal with just how insane they can be. I deal with the insanity everyday, but am hesitant for someone else to deal with it. Insanity for mama is what that is! I will miss them crazily and be so happy to come home to them….but HOLY SHIT! I’m going on vacation!!!!!!

We haven’t all been together since October of 2004 when this picture was taken. Stacey had just had Ayla, her second baby and Julie was visiting Vegas with her two boys. I’m so excited for us all to get together again.

I’m also SUPERDUPERUPER excited to go white water rafting down the White Salmon River in Oregon. We get to jump off a cliff, ride the waves, and hopefully make it out unharmed. I’ve never been rafting so I’m nervous, but so excited. We’re going hiking and mountain biking, eating yummy food, drinking yummy mojitos, and having a slumber party. Could it get any more fun?!?!?! When I think of only feeding myself for a few days, no diaper changes, no crying babies, no 5:30am wakeups, I feel a little less guilty and a little more giddy.

P.S.

A big huge sloppy wet kiss and thank you to my wonderful husband for encouraging me to go and taking his own life in his hands when volunteering to keep the crazies for three straight days. He probably won’t make that mistake again. =)

No Dada, Mama DID NOT give us any of the yummy, delicious, melt in your mouth chocolate chip cookies she made today. We swear!

What? Chocolate on my lip….what chocolate on my lip….I see no chocolate. 

I know I’m totally going to jinx myself by typing this….but it is so incredibly wonderful I can’t help myself.

It is 7:26 am Sunday morning and my babies…BOTH of them are still asleep. HOLY SHITOLA! They normally wake between 5:30 and 6:00 every single day. We went though a period where they were even waking at 5:00 for a few weeks…and let me tell you, that sucks! Yesterday and today they have slept until 7. What is going on?!?!?! Growth spurt? Whatever it is I hope it lasts. When babies sleep in, mama sleeps in and we all know how much I love my sleep!!!

And it even gets better. They are not only sleeping in they are taking a bit longer naps. They always take 45 min to 1 hour naps….last week several times they took a 2 hour nap. Laaaaaaaaaaaa. Pure Heaven.

Now because I had to go and open my big fat mouth I’m sure they will be up with the birds tomorrow…but for today I am sitting way up there on Cloud 9!

No matter what they’ll always have each other.

I can’t even put into words how upset I was today. I was so upset I cried….and I’m not too big on crying. I cried, and cried, and cried. My most prized possession….the thing I love the most….my beloved BRAND NEW CAMERA to replace my broken beloved camera had a near death experience today. Not only my beloved camera, but my macro lens, flash, and battery grip all tried to commit suicide today.

I was outside taking some macros of my sunflower that finally bloomed…I had my tripod up and my camera decked out in full macro gear. I set the camera on the kitchen counter turn away and from the corner of my eye see it tip over and go crashing to the tiled floor. HEART ATTACK. My heart stopped beating. HOLY SHIT! *Insert all of the worst cuss words you can imagine here* and throw in LOTS of exclamation points!!!!!! We’re talking about A LOT of $$ here…..and a camera that is only 3 weeks old. I picked it up noticing the huge crack in the battery pack, turn it on and nothing. It won’t even turn on. I call Jeff crying and tell him what happened and that my BRAND NEW CAMERA THAT I LOVE is broke. He tells me its ok we can get another one. WHAT!?!?!??!? Are you smoking crack. We just spent a fortune on this one not three weeks ago. We are not buying another one. It was my stupidity and carelessness that led it to breaking…..does money grow on trees?!?!?! Because if it does I need one. Yadda yadda…..more of me freaking out and crying.

The battery pack is ruined so I take it off and put the battery in the actual camera and try turning it on. OMG it turns on!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!! Falling from the counter to hard ass tile did not break the camera, the lens, or the flash. HOLY SHIT!!! It works…….HOLY SHIT!!!!!! I am NEVER, EVER leaving the tripod thingymajig on the camera EVER AGAIN.

See all of the caps and exclamation points? That is me being super duper uper upset and then happy that my camera….my most prized possession is ok. Can we say hallelujah!

Heatens eye with the macro

I have a new trick to keep the babies still while changing their diapers. Now, I realize this trick is on the ‘ewwwwww I can’t believe you do that side’, but hey, whatever works. The trick is to change the diaper while they are eating their bottle.  Yes, I know, kinda gross. These days they are all over the place during their diaper change. Rolling away, turning to the side, rolling on their bellies, scooting away from me, grabbing the diaper and trying to eat it..you name it. Those 20 second diaper changes are long gone, but at least now I can get it done without too much drama. It’s not like you never sat on the toilet peeing while eating a peanut butter and bread sandwich. Oh wait, that was me. And in my defense it was when I was running on zero sleep and crazy babies..I barely had time to brush my teeth let alone eat…cut me some slack!

I am in love with the song Hey There Delilah by the Plain White T’s.

This song reminds me so much of me and Jeff. Almost two years of long distance love. The thousands of miles in between us. Months and months of not seeing one another. Talking for hours every night on the phone. Flying to Canada and freezing my tushy off. Customs, plane trips, staying up all night playing video games. Good memories, but I’m so glad that part is over.

 
One of my favorite things is sitting and listening to Jeff play the guitar…once upon a time for me, now for me and the babies.

 
It feels so surreal that years of long distance love turned into our wonderful family and beautiful babies.

Happy Fourth Birthday Alexee!!!!!

We spent Saturday at my sister’s house for Alexee’s Birthday party. She is four tomorrow and I can’t believe how fast she grew up! We had a great day eating yummy food, swimming, and keeping the crazies entertained.

 
We took the babies swimming for the first time in the kiddy pool. Shenzie DID NOT like the pool and cried the minute I put her in the water (which was really warm). Heaten had a great time especially considering how tired and crabby he was. He liked the kiddy pool much more than the big pool and started to cry after going in the big pool.

 
As you can see for the picture above of Alexee she is really into dance. Every year I make her a layout for her scrapbook so of course this year I did a dance theme. Not my finest scrapbooking, but with two crazies to entertain all day I didn’t have much time. I hope she likes it.

 
I used to take TONS of pictures at every family function, but these days I spend all of my time entertaining the crazies. I can’t wait for the day when they don’t need so much holding so I can play more.

It’s always the little things that get me through the day. Getting so excited when Heaten clapped for the first time yesterday. Getting kisses from Shenzie. Watching both of them laugh at each other and at me. When putting Shenzie down for her nap she kept looking into the pack and play at her bear…the minute I pick it up she grabs it, pulls it to her chest, sticks her thumb in her mouth and cuddles down into me….sigh. No matter how hard the days seem it’s the little things that get me through.