Being pregnant with twins was hard. Really, really hard. The beginning 22 weeks or so weren’t bad. I was measuring 7 weeks ahead so at 22 weeks I was more like 31 weeks. At that point I was big, but not miserable. At 24 weeks I was diagnosed with Gestational Diabetes and put on bedrest. Imagine the size of a house. That is how big I would have been hadn’t it been for the GB. While it sucked to have it, it was a blessing in disguise. It forced me to eat healthy every single day and not gain nearly as much weight as I would have otherwise. I delivered at 34 weeks and 2 days having gained a total of 44 pounds. The first two weeks postpartum I lost 33 pounds. That left 11 pounds to lose. Easy Facheesy, right? Hahah…those 11 pounds are still sitting on my ass. Enter Weight Watchers. I officially started on Monday the 18th with a goal of losing 12 pounds. When I reach my first goal I will re-evaluate if I want to continue losing more.

I’m sure other moms will agree that the aftermath of having children is not pleasant. And if you are one of the fortunate ones who didn’t have to do anything to lose the weight and looked good a week after delivery, well I’m thinking bad words for you…I’m sure you can imagine which ones. =) The rest of us have to suffer with a body that doesn’t really feel like our own. I never had this muffin top before and I’m bound and determined to lose it. Buying clothes a size larger than what I normally wear, buying shirts to hide the dough belly, and not feeling cute in any of it has grown old. I am ready to be myself again. I am ready to reclaim this disaster the babies left behind and feel good again. 9 months of pregnancy followed by 16 months of baby. I’m ready, it is time. This time I mean it, no messing around.

Wish me luck. I’ll need even more luck when I join the YMCA next month and start working out. Oh how I dread those words.

As an added incentive to lose weight and get in shape I just booked a vacation to visit my best friend in San Diego this May. That gives me 10 weeks to get it together….little itty bitty bikini here I come. (Ok, not really that itty or bitty and definitely no polka dots!).

Out with the old…

In with the new…

No Sleep Dust here. Only one tired Mama and two crazy babies! No brain for posting so enjoy the crazies.

Catching some air

This looks like a comfy place to sit

Does NOT like sand

My boys

Playing at the park

Dear Sleep Fairy,

I’m sorry. I am so very sorry for whatever it was that I did to you to make you torture me this way. I will never, ever do it again. I ask of you please, please, oh please will you make my babies good sleepers again. Especially Shenzie. She is having a really tough time which makes me have a really tough time. I’m sure you understand with twins I have a hard enough time everyday without you adding to the mix. I would think that a growing baby/toddler needs more than 6 hours of sleep a night. I know that when I wake up at 2am and do not go back to sleep until 10:30am that I am VERY tired so I’m sure she is too. The loss of sleep is making her rather crabby….and by crabby I mean full blown crazy. The days are long and I really dread the nights. I used to LOVE going to bed. Crawling into the cold sheets and getting warm and cozy. Now I dread going to bed because I know my precious sleep is going to be brutally ripped from me. Oh, and the nightmares I’m having of screaming, waking babies that wake me up from a dead sleep. Not good. You see Sleep Fairy, this is a very bad position you’ve put me in and I don’t like it one bit. I hate to resort to violence, but if you don’t do something about this soon you better be prepared for the consequences. Bring your brass knuckles, because you are going to need them. Oh, and if you see the Tooth Fairy tell her I’m looking for her and I won’t stop until I find her. She may need something more than brass knuckles, because I have a SERIOUS bone to pick with her.

Thank You, Sincerely, Graciously, Beggingly,

Tired Mama and Crazy Baby

Dear Shenzie and Heaten,

Wow! Another month gone, gone, gone. You are now 16 months old and of course I’m loving it!! Well, minus the teething and cootie sickies and the sleep issues, and the screaming and crying….other than that I totally love it! This letter is way over due, about two weeks to be exact, and my excuse is you. This whole one nap thing is really, really not good. I would LOVE it if you would either a) take two naps or b) be happy with one nap. The one nap monster has paid me a visit every single day for two weeks now and I don’t want to be friends with your monster anymore.

It seems like everyday brings about something new. New words, new sounds, and new understanding of things. Watching you learn new things and experience new things is so wonderful and amazing. I am so very glad I get to spend each day with you watching you take in the world. By far the best moment of the month were those few times you both held hands while Dada and I rocked and sang to you before bed. It was so sweet. I love that you are now playing together more and make each other laugh. The best times are when you’re having alone playtime and I peek out to find you both laughing like crazy at each other. Those moments melt my heart. I hope you’ll always be best friends and love each other.

Shenzie,

Little mini me. You are so very funny and smart. Let me revise that…you are so funny and smart when we are home. When we are out or when we have company you will clam up in your shell and turn shy. The minute our company leaves or we get home out comes the funny little girl who makes me laugh. You are such a tease. I’ll ask you to bring me something and you’ll walk over with your hand out and then do a quick turn right before you get to me and run away. It cracks me up every time. You love peek a boo, hiding under things and behind things.

You are learning new words and signs. You communicate with me through sign when you’re hungry, thirsty, or you want more. Today you even did the sign for diaper when I told you that you were stinky. It was so cute. You are very good with any ‘B’ word. Ball, book, bear, bye bye, and brrr. Strangely enough you also know the word cracker. Anytime I ask if you want a snack you say cracker. I guess I need to be more diverse with snacks.

You walk so good. You actually almost run sometimes. You’re very fast and always on the go. You are constantly in motion. You have a very deliberate walk. You walk with such purpose, stomping around with determination. It is hard to describe, but very cute. Your new thing is sitting against walls or in corners and hitting your head against the wall. Strange indeed.

You have stopped being such a bully to Heaten. Maybe because he can get away from you now, or maybe because he fights back. Instead of fighting you now play. You laugh at each other and “get” each other. You remind me a lot of your cousin Alexee. She always tattles on herself when she does something bad. Unlike Heaten who will get into everything and anything, when you find something you shouldn’t have you bring it to me. Paper on the floor, here mommy. Old food on the floor, here mommy. You love to give me things. Well, you love to give anybody things. In the store the other day you tried to give some random lady your toy. You even tried to give Rachel Ray on the tv your toy. It was so funny!!

You are really into scents. You sniff everything and love when I put yummy smelling lotion on your hands….you sniff and sniff away. You also love to smell my breath. Your favorites are after I’ve used mouthwash, chewed a piece of minty gum, or had a drink of coffee. You LOVE the smell of coffee. Probably because it has so much creamer it smells like candy.

You are such a fun, funny, crazy, sweet, loving, little girl. I love every little crazy thing about you. I couldn’t imagine a more perfect daughter.

Love,
Mama.

Dear Heaten,

Where, oh where to begin. You are so adorable it is crazy! You have been so wonderful this month. So happy and content. You are by far the more mellow baby. Your favorite thing to do is to sit on Dada’s lap and pinch his arm. Your new thing is pulling arm hairs, pinching arm skin, and of course grabbing my hair or Dada’s GIANT beard.

My little boy. That is exactly what you are, such a little boy. You love to throw rocks, pick up twigs and leaves, stomp in water puddles…all things little boys love. You have found a great love for the outdoors. A couple of months ago when you first started walking you were scared of the big bad world. Now you want to take the big bad world by its horns and toot them!!! You love to play outside. The minute I put your shoes on you go running for the door. When Dada leaves in the morning and you see the open door you think you are going outside to play and then cry when you realize we aren’t going outside. You cry when we have to come back in the house. Hopefully this summer won’t be too brutal so you can play outside all day. Yippee for Mama!

You love to walk backward, push things around, chase after birds, and go for walks. You are so independent these days. You play alone or with your sister and don’t need me to constantly hold you anymore. I still get lots of love and cuddles from you though. Unlike your sister who only wants me to hold her when SHE wants it, you let me hold you anytime I want.

You love to look out the window. You get so excited when people walk by, you squeal and bang the window. You can reach the window from your crib so now instead of napping you look out the window and play. You also love to open and close doors. You lock yourself in the laundry room daily and then cry because you can’t get out. You think it is pretty funny when you trap Shenzie in the closet and make her cry.

You still do not like to sign and haven’t yet mastered any new words, but trust me little man, you make your wishes known. Your favorite word to babble non stop all day is Dada. You love to whisper so you’ll whisper dadadadadadadada over and over.

I love to play with you. When I stomp around to “get” you your whole face lights up as you turn around and waddle away as quickly as you can. You then tumble to the floor and are giggling before I even get to you. You are very ticklish on your neck and belly and recently I’ve discovered your feet too! Oh the fun we will have with tickles.

You are my perfect little son, who I love more than anything else in the whole world (of course that includes your sister and Dada).

I love you.
Love,
Mama

Black and White Cuter than Cute Edition

Dear Dada,

We wish you a superduperuper wonderful Valentines Day. We love you the most in the whole wide world. You’re the best, coolest, most awesomest Daddy in the whole universe. And please just ignore the suckers that Mama gave us so we would sit still for one second. We swear, we didn’t even lick them. Well, maybe Shenzie did, but you can’t prove it!

Love,
Shenzie and Heaten

It’s all a matter of perspective. When the babies were taking two naps (ahhhh, the good old days) a good nap was 1.5 to 2 hours twice a day. More often than not they would have ok naps of 1 hour or so. These days where they are taking ONE 30 minute nap ALL DAY LONG I would kill for those ok one hour naps. No sleep + lots of crying, screaming, and clingy =

And my good sleeper

Plasma Tv!!! Tax Time! I love it!!!

My little Heaten has been such an angel this week. I have been going crazy with Shenzie. She is cutting 3 molars on top of being sick with a cold. I have honestly never seen her so crazy. I was near tears last week with her, poor Shenzie, poor Mama, poor Heaten. He is getting the raw end of the deal. I barely have time to hold him due to Shenzie’s crazy. He has been an angel. So sweet, loving, and fun. Thank you little man for taking pity on your crazy Mama. I love you!

Daddy always says he wants to keep you in a bubble, well here you go, the next best thing!

You should see my twin.

Shenzie doing the eat sign

*Thanks to Auntie Ang for the cute shirts, we love them!!!