Ok, so I’ve heard mixed things on the terrible two’s vs. the terrible threes. Personally I didn’t think it could get any worse than the tantrums, crazy, fit throwing, fighting twos, but OMG I was SO SO very wrong. Three’s [so far] suck.
Truth be told, Heaten at three is just fine. He still has his throwing of things when I don’t understand him and the occasional outburst if he is hungry or I can’t get to him fast enough, but that is all normal. Time outs work really well with him as does 1-2-3. I am not having much of a problem with Heaten. Ok, well let me first say his OCD is out of control. I just realized last night how VERY similar Daddy and Heaten are. Heaten MUST have his closet door closed at all times. All of his dresser drawers must be closed tight. All of the doors downstairs must be closed or he’ll go close them all. He hates his hands to get dirty. He is CONSTANTLY picking his nails and they have to be cut just so. He has little weird behaviors like tugging up his pants even if they aren’t falling down or wiping his nose with his arm even though there is nothing wrong with it. He is very rigid in his schedule and routine and does not like it when it gets messed up or you don’t follow the EXACT routine. Every night Jeff has to take him thru his 30 minutes of ritual before bed and OMG forget about leaving a step out. So maybe Heaten is just as crazy at three, just not as IN MY FACE about is as Shenzie.
Then there is Shenzie. Lordy B somebody help me. Now Mom and Sissies, you can sit back and laugh all you want over the fact that she is me, just be prepared for me to drop her off at YOUR door if you do. =)
So Shenzie. She is stubborn, feisty, hot headed, crazy, silly, and sassy. Every day we have tantrums because I didn’t pick out the right undies or pants. She wants her “parkly” undies (sparkly undies of which there are NONE, she just made it up) and then throws a fit when I don’t pick out the right ones. She wants her soft pants with sparklies. She wants to pick out her clothes daily and will pick out a long sleeved shirt even though it is 80 outside. Purple shirt with bats and bright pink floral pants, sure, why not! She wants to wear her hair with two bows in her eyes. We get a lot of crazy looks and some weird comments over this one. I just give in to the crazy clothing, because when I don’t it is just not worth the tantrum. She purposely hits, scratches, and hurts me and doesn’t care that it hurt me. The hand in my face and “NO MAMA, NOW” is getting a bit old. Bossy McBossalot (yes, once again Sissies, laugh away that she is Mini Me). She refuses to apologize and time outs do NOTHING for her. For that matter, nothing is working. Time outs, toys in time out, yelling, ignoring, I’ve tried it all and I just don’t feel any of it is helping. The constant battle of wills with her is enough to drive me to drink. Oh wait, she already did that!
I can see our future, and oh my, we are going to be in constant battle.
*As a side note, Mom, let me just apologize publicly for all of the PURE HELL I put you thru, because if Shenzie is Mini Me, then you had it BAD!
I know I’m not the only Mom who wants it all. To be a good, patient, kind, mother. To be a teacher and good example. To be a good wife. To have a clean home. And to still find the time to be good to yourself and do the things that make you happy. I just want it all, and right now none of it is happening. I am not being a good, patient, kind mother or wife. My house looks like a constant toy tornado ran thru it. I have zero time for anything other than work which DOES make me happy when I’m not killing myself to get it all done.
I have reached my limit. I was only going to do 4 sessions a month (one a weekend), but somehow I’m doing 8 or more each month and I just don’t have the time to do it all and have it all. I am working 30+ hours a week and am stretching myself too short in all areas. Nothing is getting my 100% and it is making me unhappy, stressed, and tired.
Now I’m sure you’re sitting over there wondering to yourselves why I don’t just say no to new clients. Hahahah. I just can’t say no. I added two more sessions recently to my already beyond full schedule because A) I just hate to say no and turn people down especially when I was their chosen photographer B) I am trying to build my business and any client I take is a potential repeat client and may refer me to someone else. I LOVE my work, I really, really LOVE it. I am just overwhelmed with too much of it and no time to do it.
Enter preschool. Jeff and I have been going back and forth for some time now about preschool. The only draw back is it is like $600 or more a month for two HALF days. Jeff is totally ok to pay that, I however, am not. What a rip off. So I got a referral from a client for a home based preschool that I had REALLY high hopes for. Unfortunately it didn’t pan out so I’m back to where I started. Stressed, tired, and crazy. I really wanted to start off with 2 half days. I have never left my kids with anyone (other than family) so I want to start small and work my way into two full days. I found a really awesome in home preschool that is a little more than I wanted to spend, but it is only 2 FULL days. I have an interview with her tomorrow and while I really don’t know about the full days I can’t help but get excited over the prospect of two FULL days to myself to work, clean, and get my life in order. I know I will be a better, more patient Mom when I am not in a constant state of stress and anxiety. My concerns are of course that the kids will cry and not like it. That they still nap and won’t sleep at the preschool. That I am being selfish and they are too young to go….etc. etc. I’m sure all Moms feel this way about leaving their kids for the first time, but seriously, I just hope to be WOWED by the school so I can stop worrying and get my life back under control. So wish me luck on my interview and cross your fingers that maybe, just maybe I can have it all (and not feel too guilty about it). =)
Auntie Dara loaned us her old scooters and the twinzies LOVE them. When it comes to riding bikes Shenzie blows Heaten out of the water. Heaten on the other hand is the King of the Road on his scooter. It is funny that he can barely pedal his bike and doesn’t really like it and Shenzie loves her bike and can do circles around him, but isn’t as good on the scooter and doesn’t really like it.
I also love in the video Shenzie’s new thing of “Ummm, blah”. When I ask her a question now she will pause and say Ummmm before she will answer. You can also see her new game of fake names. She loves to call us made up names or switch Mommy and Daddy or call a duck a bunny. Cracks herself up every time.
Also, note their gloves. It is 80 degrees outside, but my kids insist on wearing their five finger gloves. Crazies!
I’ve been a blog posting maniac at my Photo Blog lately. Head over there to see some adorable cuteness including my niece, my first Mini Sessions, a gorgeous Mama to be, my best friends new baby, new photos from my very first client, and tons more.
For the past five weeks or so I have had a daily headache that at times turns into a full blow migraine. If you’ve ever had a migraine you know that even the sound of someone walking on the carpet hurts, so imagine two yelling 2.11 year olds running around. This is pure hell. The headache is always at the top front of my head, my forehead, and my eye area. I’ve ruled out a sinus infection and after many days of pure hell I’ve realized it might be my eyes. I started wearing my glasses all the time and the headaches have lessened, but not gone away completely. I used to only wear my glasses while driving, and it SUCKS to have to wear them all of the time. I went to the eye doctor last week and my eyes have changed so I am in the process of updating both pairs of glasses (regular and sunglasses) which means this week I’m using my glasses from like 7 years ago. The headaches (and migraines ) are back in full force and OMG, they suck!! I am praying once I get my new prescription the headaches will go away completely, but just to be safe I’m going to get my blood work done as well. Since I had Gestational Diabetes and it runs heavily in both sides of my family I am at great risk to get it. I want to rule out diabetes as the cause of my eyes getting worse and/or the headaches. Having diabetes for 12 weeks SUCKED ASS, it will really be a sad day if I get it and I will cry.
Ok, I wrote that top part like a month ago and never finished it because I was waiting to have a CAT Scan and see an ENT. The scan came back with abnormalities so I waited three weeks to see the ENT. The prognosis is my cold turned into an infection turned into severely swollen sinuses causing the headaches. I have a steroid nose spray and spray antihistamine to use until it goes away.
Holy smokes! All of that pain and drama for that!?!?!? I was for sure I had a brain tumor and that I was going to die. Whew, what a relief!!
Speaking of Ouchie Awa’s - Shenzie gave herself a doozy of a black eye one night while throwing a tantrum and dropping to the ground only to smack her face into the daybed.
Poor little girl was crazy after it happened. She takes after me and gets angry when she gets hurt. Then the next day she scraped up the inside of her hand and rubbed two big blisters on her feet. =( She is healing nicely and will hopefully remember next time she has a tantrum to land on something soft. =)
We’ve entered a new phase at the old Casa de’ Barr. Privacy please.
It all started when I wanted some privacy to go pee in peace (which still isn’t happening). It has since turned into a means to get into things. Shenzie will ask Privacy Mama to go pee. She can now pull her undies and pants down, scoot back to the big potty, slide on, and get off all by herself. She no longer needs the little potty seat that sits on top. I’m still working on Heaten and I KNOW he can do it alone, but like most things he wants me to do it for him.
*Video notes: Just ignore the dirty face and shirt. She still wears a diaper for bedtime so this was first thing in the morning before we took it off. Also, ignore my dirty bathroom counter. =)
Anyway….the privacy please has evolved into anytime Shenzie knows she shouldn’t be doing something she asks for privacy. Putting stickers all over her walls and crib, Privacy Mama. Pulling off 1/2 a roll of toilet paper and flushing it down the toilet, Privacy Mama. Sneaking candy from the candy drawer, Privacy Mama. It cracks me up every time. Now if only I could teach her to give ME Privacy Please!!
And because I have to be fair, here is a video of Heaten on the balance beam our last day of totnastics.
